And so we came to it at last. All the months of training had led me, us, to this point - the day of the grading. Success today would mean a yellow belt in place of my beginner's white one and a sense of personal triumph.

The night before, I'd gone through my Kihon Dosa more times than I care to recall and tried to ghost-apply my techniques. As the day of the grading dawned though, I just felt excitement. The nerves were to a minimum. I just kept thinking to myself, "Stay calm, breathe, you know this." If I kept my head I would get my yellow belt. I suppose the best way to deal with it all, is to approach the thing like a normal lesson - so I did.

We got the mats out, laid out some chairs for the audience, come to support us and just got on with it. Once Sensei arrived, the grading commenced; things kicking off with a warm-up as usual. We also had another Sensei, Simon, watching us, from the Ken Shin Kai - which was cool; we could show him what we could do. "It's your mat," Sensei had always told us. Now was our chance to prove it.

The first order of the grading was Kihon Dosa. This was practiced in exactly the same way as we'd always done in the lesson, the familiarity was comforting.

After that, we were arranged in lines at one end of the mat and proceeded to go through the breakfalls.

Leila and Ryszard were up first going for a much higher grading than the rest of us and after an impressive, if lengthy display, it was time for us beginners to get stuck in and do our techniques.

Our names were called out in pairs, one shite, one uke, in groups of six to eight. Then techniques were called out in no particular order and we carried them out, shite and uke alternating their roles as the techniques progressed. I was left in the final group. A little nerve-wracking, all that waiting, but finally I got my chance.

I was really focused, so much so that I was told afterwards my shoulders were visibly tense. The techniques went well, I couldn't recall a mistake but oddly afterwards, as soon as we were done, my memory of the last few minutes went completely blank, such was my relief and concentration.

It was over.

Now it was just a matter of watching some superb showcase Jiyu Waza, Ryan grade for his green belt and the deliberations of Andy and Simon to discover whether or not we had passed.

The time came at last and Andy and Simon came in with their notes and debriefed us all. Relief and pride flowed over me like a tangible wave as Simon and Andy said how well we had all done. I knew then I'd done it. It was quite a feeling. Going down the line, my heart swelled, when Andy presented me with my belt.

I don't think I've ever been so proud and humble to receive something that keeps up my pants. But this obviously was much, much more. It was a symbol of achievement, a record of aptitude and I will wear it proudly.

Looking back, there are times when I questioned the validity of my decision to take up Aikido. All of the early trepidation, mixed with empowerment, deep lows and soaring highs. It's quite a ride when all is said and done, and my journey isn't over yet. Aikido has opened my eyes and exposed my soul in a way that I never thought anything like this could.

I have found it a great source of inner-strength and a way of finding out about myself too. I look forward to the days ahead, to learning more, to increasing my aptitude. Doubtless there'll be challenges ahead, times of empowerment and times of doubt too.

I hope to experience them all and would recommend this journey to anyone. You never know where it will take you.

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